Q. What should you do if you see your ex-husband rolling around in pain on the ground?
A. Shoot him again.

What's the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary?
Get married on his birthday.

What is the one thing that all men at singles bars have in common?
They're married.

Personally I think one of the greatest things about marriage is that
as both husband and Father, I can say anything I want to around the
house.

Of course, no one pays the least bit of attention.